blogahrah

i’ve lured you all in with cookies and treats and humor, all for the purpose of soon closing my trap of a serious post. snap, i’ve caught you. mwahaa.

so strangely, its like i only have 11 credits that work for next semester. strange for an engineer eh? i guess its the semester for gen eds…but i’m clepping, taking online, taking other schools, etc etc. so i figger, i’ll take advantage of all these gold opportunities offered by going to the bible-kinda college. i’ll take super sweet classes about the bible. woot!

only…i can count on my fingers the number of classes we have rooted directly in the text. but i have to take off my shoes and then some to count the number of worldview classes, “applicable” spiritual-related classes, etc etc…i don’t understand why there are so many more of those. is it strange we go to a bible college, but its hard to find actual classes on the bible itself?

and that scares me. if we begin giving much more classes on women’s ministry, the youth pastor, urban ministry, etc etc, and offer less and less classes on the text itself, who is going to preserve that truth? cedarville, as a more conservative institution, should be a brilliant place to preserve the truth and teachings of biblical texts. even it seems to be annoying at times, extreme conservative institutions plays a strong role in carrying biblical text through otherwise hazy cultural times, right?

God will protect and conserve his word…thats not going to be a problem. but hopefully cedarville won’t lose that role. even if people become less and less interested in that, and want more stuff that relates to the world they live in…sigh. i love learning for learning and knowledge for knowledge’s sake, as God becames more and more amazing the more you know about everying…but things seem to be strolling away from that. talking with some members of the bible department revealed that there used to be many more text-based classes, but they decided it was important to move to more ‘practical’ things, for lack of a better word, and people were less interested in pure bible classes and more into personal evangalism, small group ministry, and CLT. well, not CLT. but a bit less worldview and a bit more bible….mmm, yummy. id get excited.

apparently if i shoot the bug at the top of the screen, i’ll get a free playstation 2, so ill let you know how that goes.

First of all, for those who didn’t quite catch the subtle reference I gave in my last post to “happy freakin april fools”, happy freaking april fools. Which is to say, my post on April 1st, ie April Fools day, was a joke. Which is to say, it’s not true. Which is to say, I’m not leaving the ‘ville just yet. Which is to say, I’ll be here next year. Which is to say, Laura, you should have picked up on that instead of posting on the next post that you would miss me. But I’ll miss you as well, over the summer.

First of all again, I’m a little upset. Me and Leah are apparently dating, and I haven’t seen her in at least three days. She should have been aware that we need to see each other at least every 5 minutes, and sit across each other staring deeply into each others eyes. So if anyone sees her, tell her I miss her terribly. Tell her I’m lost without her. Tell her I don’t care who she is, where she’s from, what she did, as long as she loves me. And that IIIIIII will always love her. That every step she takes, every move she makes, every vow she breaks, I’ll be watching her. Yeah, thats right.

One of my other friends Mary told me that her mom was scared of me. I don’t know why.

And, in closing, I like to sneak into girls bathrooms.

Well uh, happy freakin april fools.  Funny joke, yay!  Oh
well.  I haven’t gotten to bed til 4am or later all this week,
sometimes til 5:30, so I’m pretty beat.  But it’s 3:30 now, why am
I still up?  The answer to that is clear from a few posts
back. 

I have good news!  Leah Jones and I are now pretty much
dating.  You see, she promised me some Jone’s Potato Chips, which
are world reknowned for their epic flavor as well as their
aphrodisiacal qualities.  I made it quite clear to her that if I
didn’t get some, the consequences would be dire.  Her diabolical
roomate finished them off, leaving me no choice but to force her to
date me.  Here’s a picture of us on our first date on a scenic
nameless island somewhere far away from everyone else.

Pretty much we’re just going to gorge ourselves on potato chips, until we end up looking like that Palmer boy Ben.

I’ve come to the end of the rope.  This will be my last semester
here; then I’ll be gone.  Are chaplains allowed to leave after
their term is served?  I’m just sick of Cedarville, can’t really
take it anymore.  Most of you know I have never really ‘liked’
Cedarville..and I definetly still don’t.  I am NOT attempting to
make any sort of judgement call on Cedarville itself, nor its
rules.  I’m not saying their wrong, or bad.  They’re just not
ME, at all. Does that make sense?  I’m a terrible dancer, but hey,
it’s a brilliant stress relief.  Oftentimes I feel pulled to go to
places we’re “not allowed” to go, in order to touch people’s
lives.  I ain’t a bad kid.  My parents back home, as opposed
to my parents other places, I suppose, don’t give me any rules. 
They say that I’ve earned their trust, and that even involves them
trusting me to be the man they have trained me to be in situations they
KNOW will not good; they let me do those things.  Rules are fine
and good, at times.  The tendency in the Bible seems to show,
however, that spiritual discernment, not rules, are the  mark of
maturity.  I’ve been raised by amazing, godly parents, and they’ve
trained me to seek God above all else.  I don’t want Cedarville to
throw in a lot of extraneous laws of man that will harm my thinking
about God.  Therefore, I must leave.  There’s plenty of other
little things too…Cedarville is just so NOT me, the theology is
different, the denomination, I don’t buy it…etc. etc.  But
sometimes, there comes a time to follow God’s leading elsewhere, and I
beleive He’s showing me that Cedarville is NOT me, and calling me
elsewhere.  This is not just an angry “I hate you all I’m leaving”
sort of thing.

But, I love you all, and I will miss you dearly.  And this xanga will stick around, eh?  Sweet.

And to keep things lighthearted, here’s a picture of someone I went to high school with.  Actually, just their foot.

It’s 2:31am.  However, in other time zones, it is other
times.  I found out something interesting.  My drug of choice:

You scored as Mushrooms. Shrooms! You’re still goin for one of the most natural drugs. You’d like to visit a whole other world, and see things you’ve never seen before. #&#*in trippy. Mushrooms 100% Ecstacy 69% Cocaine 69% Marijuana 63% None! 50% Inhalents 44% Alcohol 44%

Smurf yeah…I’d say that was
pretty
accurate.  But not talking about just my general appearance,
talking about the drug.  Since I’ll probably be baptist before
long, I most
likely never will never try such things.  But its something I’d
really like to do, just
because.  I score really highly on those “Would ya do it for the
experience” or “Would you do it just to do it?” or “Are you an idiot
and can’t even pretend you were trying to impress people, you just
thought it’d be interesting to do if no one found out and if you died
no one would know why?”  sort of things. The careful observer will
see apparently that I would not (and this quiz does not lie!) drink or
sniff, I’d rather not do drugs at all!  Oh well.

And to finish this post, here is a CedarSara(h)â„¢ Edition of Girls who
Are Not Dating Me, albeit only a small portion of Sara(h)s here.

    Sarah Gilbert      Sarah Petersen    Sarah
Searles

And, so as to not discriminate against the Sara-without-H’s,

    Sara Hayes

***Disclaimer
I don’t actually know nor recognize any of these Sara(h)’s, and make no
claim to actually have written this post myself, thereby releasing
myself from liability should any of these Sara(h)’s, real or imagined,
stumble upon their own pictures and throw rocks at me.

So, I’ve decided to explain a few things about myself, to those who
were wondering.  Answers to questions, really, rhetorical and self
explanatory, big, small, and olive colored.  For the ease of the
visual learner and those who are simply dumb, the answers are just pictures.

Question #1:
Hey Mike I haven’t seen you for awhile.  Where have you been?

Answer #1:

Question #2:
Jew, I was wondering…you’re really sexy and good looking.  Why don’t you have a girlfriend?

Answer #2:

Question #3:
No, seriously.  If you could just do anything all day without having to worry about anything else, what would it be?

Answer #3: No, seriously, I do this anyway.

Question #6: What’s your favorite band?

Answer #6:
U2

And for those of you who didn’t understand my last post, something for the masses to enjoy:

BECAUSE YOU CAN’T CONTROL ME!

I highly doubt this means anything to anyone.
But if you understand it…celebrate with me!

That is all.

I believe it was Strong Bad who wisely put it this way…

The System is Down

and he was referring to my hard drive that went boom.

Update pending arrival of shiny new drives.

Honored guests and esteemed diplomats-

It was a special day for Palmer HO!all as we went to Dr. William Brown’s (aka b^2) house Sunday evening. For the visual learner:

We sat there, and stuff.  That’s really it.  I did find out the source of their secret power.

There you have it.  The secret of the Brown family power. 
Calcium, Centrum, napkin holders, and I point out with great
enthusiasm, shrooms.